Messy Missy!!!!


Such times when I feel like digging a hole in the sand and burying my face in it ,come in abundance in my life. I lived my life in jealousy of people who display good qualities ,consistently.Like those who are always sure about which side of the debate they are on,like those who are always truthful, always punctual,always perfectly clean.I, for one, have dismally few good qualities and and for another,consistency comes to me with a lot of difficulty..

Each day when I take a subway,I watch in admiration ,ladies, dressed perfectly.Their hair done so well like they walked out of a salon.Their makeup all in the right place.They jewellery matching their clothes,and clothes that fit like the tailor stiched them up while they stood in the shop.And there I am , each day is a bad hair day,I go from deciding to let down my hair, to pinning it up in different stlyes and then back to letting them down, after 15 minutes of brushing and unsuccessful attempts at styling(?)

I NEVER find clothes that fit me right. WHY! the pants are always loose, and the tops are small.I keep the same pieces jewellery on for atleast 3 days and stick to the diamond stud or pearl..When I apply eyeliner I manage to touch it just seconds before it dries . In an attempt to wipe only the messed part I end up with a completely spread mascara, and a critical 10 minutes gone from the getting ready in the morning...Problem is that on some days I actually manage to look good, so there goes consistency...

I try to always keep important things safely.Sometimes I keep them so safe that I forget where they are.It's terrible to have to explain this to someone....I mean how do you put it " It's safe..it just that I dont know where!!"

I bang into revolving doors,fall while walking, I spill stuff on me right during the first sip.Just moments after we have left our home but are far enought to not want to go back, I get panic stricken about whether I left something ON.The iron, the light in front of God's idol , the stove ,the dryer etc ..My husband has learnt to pick up that look immediately.

Also, just when we want to go out I feel like looking for this last time whether I have my wallet and I start to dig in my bag, frantically only to find it somewhere else like in my pocket or something. All this while hubby dear looks on with that i'm-trying-to-hide-my-anger look.

I can never try a beauty product for the said 4 weeks.I get bored feel it is not working and move on.

I can never be angry for long.So no one takes me seriously.
When I see movies where some girl angered by something meticulously plans and destroys her enemy I feel, I can even be angry at something that long????

So you see, I am confused.I always would love to ask acquaintances as to what was their first impression of me was, and do they find me as contradictory to their intial image as I find myself?